When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich. ~M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter
Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person, having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and with a breath of kindness blow the rest away. ~Dinah Craik
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